June 26, 2011

• Whew!  My children, grandchildren and whatever friends might be dependent upon me in time of need can now rest a bit easier. IF (and this is admittedly a big IF)…IF terrorists or natural disaster should strike all the sock factories all over the world at once, rendering them unable to knit millions and billions of socks for those of us with feet, YOU, my lucky ones, will not have to go sockless. I have learned how to make a sock!

                      

  This is, admittedly, a feeble first attempt.

  And it is only one.

  BUT! I now know how to do it, and if necessity should force me, I COULD make another one.

  Just not right this minute.

  Seriously, knitters the world over are absolutely smitten with knittin’ mittens…oops, I mean socks…. with knitten’ socks right now. And I have bucked the trend long enough. A couple of weeks ago, I bit the bullet and bought a big ball of sock yarn. Lisa, at a wonderful place called One City Market, who knows all things knitty and helps all of us wannabes, suggested a large man’s sock for my beginner project.

  The pattern says “fits size 7-12.” Well, all I can say is… if a man with size 7 feet tried this sock on, it would be one-legged pants for him, pulled right up to his chin.

  The pattern called for size 6 needles, and Lisa and her friend Terri (a knit-policewoman who makes people do things RIGHT the first time) insisted that I do a swatch to check my gauge. I conceded, knitted up a little swatch and measured it. It seemed just right, but I guess my swatch was a bit too small to tell.

  So, in the end my sock turned out to be size G for Giant. Now I’m looking for a one-legged lumberjack with huge, muscular calves to wear this sock so that I don’t have to make another one just like it and can start a second pair on smaller needles with different yarn, maybe some that would fit ME.

                    

  But so I could show you a picture, my resident farmboy let me put the sock on his foot, just for art’s sake. And now, even though it is a tad large and not so perfect where I picked up the stitches to make the heel, my foot model says it feels pretty darn good on his foot. In fact, he doesn’t want to take it off. In fact, he says if I’ll make one more, he’ll wear the pair. And in fact, if I’ll make him a sweater he’ll wear that, too, and why haven’t I done that before??!!

  He has memory loss, I guess. I remember this certain navy blue v-neck pullover sweater vest, back in 1972, knitted while I was taking 18 hours that fall semester (but still, there’s time to knit, in between reading novels in three days and writing papers–we make time for the important stuff, right?) and presented as a Christmas present, humbly but lovingly, because there was NO money for bought presents in those days….and I don’t recall that it was ever worn, even though that v-neck was just a little bit crooked and a little longer on one side and the armholes gapped just a bit, like maybe they would also have fit a lumberjack…he’s forgotten that sweater.

  I’m forgetting sweaters, too, and going back to socks. It really is nice to know that we could have warm feet if disaster strikes. However, there is one more issue that would necessarily have to be addressed…the sheep to grow the wool to spin the yarn….I’d need sheep. Yes, and a spinning wheel of some kind…and combs….and…yes, there’s more to this sock business than meets the eye. Maybe the terrorists will strike something a little less important….

  • 6:44 pm
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